I live with my adult son who is mentally handicapped from birth. He never had a job or went to school like other kids. I’ve struggled most of my life to make ends meet while taking care of him. His father left shortly after he was born and rarely paid child support. It was all on me We barely make ends meet most months and never have extra funds for car repairs or even things like shoes or new clothes. I’m always balancing the need for groceries, which are so expensive right now, and things like winter boots or a coat for my son. At the moment we mainly need a new bed for my son, he hasn’t had a new bed since he was a child and is now 35 years old. My car also needs new tires before winter so we can get to my son’s doctor’s appointments and it needs repairs. It would be a blessing to be able to afford these things, but we barely make ends meet most months. I go to the pantry when I can, but I cannot leave my son at home alone and it is difficult to take him to public places. Most people are afraid of its outbursts and movements. He doesn’t mean anything by it, it’s his only way of showing his excitement. I don’t know where else to turn for help.
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I felt the need to visit this woman and her son. I called them for more details and to make sure I had everything they would need.
We chatted for a long time when I found out about the difficult pregnancy and birth of her son. His disabilities were severe and required the woman’s constant care and supervision. The woman loved her son with a fierceness and she shared how she was hurt and not understanding by the way people looked at him. Most of us do not live with and do not care for a loved one with a severe disability and when I reminded the woman of this, she cried. She said: “I know that. You’re right. I just wish everyone could see the good in them, but they only see the outside and that’s unlike everyone else.”
As we went through their budget, I could see how they lived very frugally. There were no extras like cable TV or internet. The rent was reasonable as she had lived in the same little cottage for years. The things they could not afford were given up. This included a much needed winter coat and boots for the son and new tires for the car. Those were things we could help them with.
I made notes for checks to bring with me on my visit. I would check her car when I came over. I brought gift cards for groceries, toiletries, clothes and new linens. I ordered a new bed for the son and made sure they had enough room for a slightly larger bed so his feet wouldn’t end up hanging down as the mum told me they were in his current child size mattress.
I made an appointment to stop by the woman’s house, but I just told her a volunteer would come by. She thanked me profusely, thinking it would be the last time we spoke. A few hours later, I got to her door and knocked. I saw the surprised look on the woman’s face as she realized it was me. The elderly woman started crying and hugged me. She kindly invited me. Her son saw me and started making loud noises from his wheelchair. His mother said reassuring words to calm him down and I could see that he understood and then she introduced us. He couldn’t speak, but his smiling face told me everything I needed to know. He was pleased that I came to visit and it made my heart happy to know that we were helping this deserving woman and her son.
After visiting the mother and son for some time, I noticed that the son became calmer in his way of communicating. I watched them interact in their own way of communicating. When we were done visiting, I checked her food supplies and her car. I made arrangements to have her car repaired and much needed tires fitted. I provided a rent check and a gas utility check to prepare them for the upcoming winter bills. I also presented the woman with an envelope containing several gift cards for clothes, shoes, new bedding, and needed groceries. I let them both know that I had several special volunteers who would like to visit me regularly. The mother smiled at the prospect of more caring visitors as she spent most of her time alone with her son. As I walked to the door I couldn’t leave without another hug from the mother and then we were both surprised when the son reached for a hug as well. I saw the tears on the mother’s face when we said goodbye.
Thank you “you” and God bless “you” for making this help and all of our good works possible.
Health & Happiness, Love & GOD bless everyone, Sal
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monuments: Don and Kathy Urich in memory of Ruth Arlene Kinsman. Frank and Mary Gauger in memory of Bill Mangold. Scott and Kathryn Loveless in memory of Daryl Peck.
prayer beads: The power of prayer and positive thoughts comes from the true healer, our Lord, who answers our prayers.
Please pray for healing for the following people: Brian, Talyn, Mike, Sylvia, Richard, Jennifer, Jayden, Maria C., Alex, Lily, Kaitlyn, Sheila, Rhonda, Deda Lee, Betty, Marilyn, Helen, Dennis, Mary, Joseph, Jordan, Jean, Tom L. , dr Peter, Alyce, Matthew, Pam E, Jenene B, John S, Patricia H, Darlene, Ron K, Marian K, Judy, Wendy, Eric, Anthony, Mary, Charlie, Tom P, Christina, Billy, Mike, Cheryl and Ellie.
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